Kids. Every day is a blessing, and the things that come out of their mouths, well, it’s like butterfly kisses from Jesus. Am I right? Of course I am.
Jones, my three year old, was curled up in the corner of our couch, pouting. I asked him what was wrong. This was his answer.
Which I find horribly offensive because, a.) You’re three. What do YOU know about lipstick? You still have super heroes on your underpants. You can’t tell me about fashion when your shoes still Velcro, okay?
And b.) this is the offending shade:
COME ON, MAN! Props to me, at almost 40, for pulling off what is clearly a College Freshman Level Selfie. The angle, the lips, it’s like we almost had the Internet back when I was in school.
Do you know who else wears purple lipstick? That’s right. Rihanna. So maybe I will take your ‘you don’t like my lipstick’ and raise you one ‘don’t make me get my hat’.
Yours in refusing to dress and/or act my age,